What Would You Do?
Learn from real scenarios. Practice responding with confidence.
These are real situations staff face. There is no “perfect” answer—just thoughtful, respectful responses. Use these to learn, practice, and talk as a team.
10 scenarios
Assumptions About an Older Gay Man
Staff assume a 70-something gay resident is lonely and alone — until his long-term partner shows up and gets dismissed.
A Black Trans Woman’s Dignity
A Black trans woman in her 50s is admitted. Staff keep “forgetting” her pronouns, and one comments on her body. She feels erased.
Pronouns and Dementia: Respecting Identity
A trans resident in his 60s with early-stage dementia is admitted. Some staff think pronouns “don’t matter anymore.” His family disagrees.
Body-Shaming and Sexuality
A gay man in his 60s with a larger body is shamed by staff for his size and dismissed when his partner visits. He feels ashamed and alone.
Assumptions About a Racialized Person with Mobility Challenges
A racialized resident with mobility challenges is spoken to loudly and slowly, as if she does not understand English. She is fluent.
Staff Discomfort with Intersex Identity
An intersex resident in their 40s hears a staff member say “that’s not natural” and “God made you one way.” They feel judged and unsafe.
When Family Doesn’t Accept a Resident’s Identity
A queer resident in her 70s has adult children who do not accept her identity and pressure staff to “help her change.” She is caught in the middle.
Respecting Two-Spirit Identity and Indigenous Culture
An Indigenous Two-Spirit resident in his 60s has his identity dismissed as “just being gay” and his cultural practices go unaccommodated. He feels culturally erased.
A Racialized Gay Couple: Multiple Forms of Discrimination
A racialized gay couple in their 60s are treated differently than white gay couples — comments about being “loud,” assumptions about their background. They feel targeted.
Infantilization of a Trans Person with Intellectual Disability
A trans man in his 30s with an intellectual disability is infantilized by staff who decide he “doesn’t really understand gender.” He is left out of his own decisions.
How to use these scenarios
Think first. Then compare approaches.
1. Read the situation
Each scenario is a real moment staff face—with the intersectional details that make it complicated. Take it in.
2. Write your response
Before you see any guidance, type what you would actually do or say. There is no right answer—just your thoughtful response.
3. Compare and reflect
Reveal possible approaches and see the impact of each. Then use the discussion prompts with your team at huddle.
These scenarios are practice. If something is happening right now, head to our Facing an Incident page for step-by-step guidance and a fillable incident report.
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We can facilitate these scenarios with your team, adapt them to your setting, and help you build the confidence that prevents incidents before they happen.
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